The first day of high school is the day that everyone dreads, right? I had always wanted to go to Honokaa school, for as long as I can remember. I came from a small school, in a small town called Paauilo. The day that I left that school I was happy as can be, until the realization hit me. I was going to be in high school, in a new school with new people. As the days of summer dwindled away, I grew more nervous. 

The day finally came, August 8, 2023. The thing I’d been dreading the most, was here. I woke up to the sound of my mom exclaiming, “Bryanah Megan Jhanel Castro, wake up right now!” I didn’t want to wake up, I wanted to stay in my warm cozy bed and sleep for just a little longer. I didn’t want to face reality, I couldn’t accept the fact that I had school. 

As I got ready for school, I started to feel anxious. Every second that passed by, made me doubt myself. I began to feel nauseous like my stomach was doing flips. I eventually finished getting ready. My straight hair, my black shirt, and my blue jeans. All I had to do next was eat breakfast, then I’d be out the door. My mom prepared me bacon and scrambled eggs. Those are my favorite foods to eat for breakfast. I thought to myself, “Maybe it was going to be an okay day after all.”

 I tried to keep an enthusiastic attitude but as it turns out I might not be ready for this at all.  Heading out the front door, I felt my heart drop. I was genuinely nervous about going to school. I haven’t had many experiences where a big change has happened. Going to high school is a life-changing experience in every teen’s life, almost like a rite of passage. I walked to the car, I couldn’t shake off this anxious feeling. As my mom was driving me to school, I rolled the windows down to breathe the refreshing air.

 I didn’t know where I was going, it was my first time at Honokaa High School. I had no clue where any of my classes were, or what to expect from any of my teachers. What if my teachers were mean? Maybe they were strict? These thoughts were running through my mind, I was thinking the worst possible things that could happen to me. 

At last, I was at the place that I feared the most. I was running a bit late to school, I was worried that I wouldn’t find any of my classes. I didn’t have a map of the school. My mom dropped me off on the sidewalk near the office. As we pulled up to the school my mom told me, “ Have a good day Bry, love you.” I replied, “Thank you, Mom, love you.” 

My heart was beating at a rapid rate, my palms were sweaty. I thought to myself, “What if people don’t like me, what if I look weird? What if I’m an outcast?” That would be kind of embarrassing for me. The crowds of kids walking on the sidewalk made me feel intimidated, I just did not want to be judged. At Pa’auilo School, I always felt judged and criticized for everything I did. The school was small so everybody noticed everything. Being judged made me feel bad about myself, considering that Honokaa is a bigger school it might be worse. I walked to the office looking at the ground the entire time. My aunty works in the office so I asked her, “Aunty do you know where E-1 is?” She responded, “Here let me give you a map, love.” She handed me a map and I was on my way to Ms.Shelby Matsumoto’s advisory class. The sound of bells ringing, kids having conversations, and people laughing surrounding me, made me feel crummy. I wasn’t so confident in myself. 

Nevertheless, I got into Ms. Shelby’s classroom. I stood by the door contemplating and trying to prepare myself for what was going to happen next. I arrived later than everyone else so when I entered the classroom, everyone had their eyes on me. I felt really shy and didn’t say a word. She greeted me in a friendly manner, “Hi! What is your name?” I muttered, “Bryanah.” She seemed like a nice teacher so I felt at ease in that classroom, at least I knew my teacher was nice. Maybe things were turning around for the better? She started the class with a group activity, everyone was talking, and people seemed kind in that classroom. We ended the class with a small tour of the school that made me feel better and familiarized me with my surroundings. After Ms. Shelby’s class, we went to t first period. When I entered the class there weren’t that many people there yet. It was only the 9 graders. We did some group activities in that class also, I worked with others and I had a fun time with them. I started to like school, everyone seemed nice so far. 

Next was recess, I walked to the bleachers and sat down by myself. I kept to myself and was really quiet. I felt a tap on my shoulder, I turned around and my childhood friend from Paauilo. I hugged her and said, ‘Hi Kaile! Oh my gosh, I never seen you for so long.” We started to talk stories, and we had a fun time catching up and talking with each other. She told me how things worked around the school and how everyone is nice if you mind your own business. Kaile introduced me to her friend group, and they all welcomed me in a friendly way. 

The rest of the day was really good, I made new friends and realized school wasn’t so bad after all. What I learned from this experience is your life is changing no matter what so you have to just adapt to it; maybe it is for the better. You need to see the positive aspects in life, don’t just focus on the negative. This moment is really memorable to me because it made me realize my true self, I came out of my shell and started talking to others and making new friends.  As the day proceeded, we laughed together, made great memories with one another, and overall had a great time. This event altered my life by helping me become a more extroverted person. I became comfortable with the school and with the people around me. This change was beneficial for me, I liked school more than I would have thought. I’m ecstatic that I had this change in my life, it affected me in such a positive way.